The Crow
written by David J. Schow & John Shirley, from the graphic novel by James O'Barr
Top Dollar: Well, well, well. Devil's Night is upon us again. Figured we'd throw a little party, start a bunch of fires, make a little profit. (gang cheers) Problem is: it's all been done before.
Gangster: That's no reason to quit!
Top Dollar: Wrong. That's the perfect reason to quit. The only reason to quit. A man has an idea. The idea attracts others, like-minded. The idea expands. The idea becomes an institution. What was the idea? That's what's been bothering me, boys. I tell ya: when I used to think of the idea itself, it put a big ol' smile on my face. Greed is for amateurs. Disorder. Chaos. Anarchy. Now that's fun!
Gangster 2: What about Devil's Night?
Top Dollar: What about it? I started the first fires in this goddamn city. Before I knew it, every charlatan and shitheel was imitating me. You know what they got now? Devil's Night greeting cards. Isn't that precious? The idea has become the institution, boys. Time to move on.
Gangster 3: You don't want us to do "light my fire" time for the whole city?
Top Dollar: No, I want you to set a fire so goddamn big, the gods will notice us again, that's what I'm saying. I want all you boys to look me straight in the eye one more time and say: ARE WE HAVING FUN OR WHAT??!! Hey, you! What's your name? Skank? You don't feel that?
Skank: (scared) I feel like a little worm on a big fucking hook!
(laughter)
Top Dollar: Like a little worm on a big fucking hook! Well, boy, your mama must be damn proud of you! (the crow enters and caws) How'd that thing get in here?
Eric: Gentlemen!
(The Crow/Eric enters. Skank panics and begins mumbling to himself.)
Top Dollar: You're him, huh? The Avenger. The Killer of Killers. Nice outfit. Not sure about the face though.
Eric: I just want him.
Top Dollar: Well, you can't have him.
The Crow: Well. I see you've made your decision. Now let's see you enforce it.
Top Dollar: Oh, this is already boring the shit outta me! Kill him!
(The whole table shoots the Crow repeatedly and uselessly)
Many thanks go to Mike for corrections this monologue, it is very much appreciated.