I have a distinct distaste for a lot of really popular movies that a lot of people take way too seriously when the movie does have a lot of flaws under its undoubtedly good intentions (i.e, the thing that the road to hell is paved with). These include (but are not limited to) "Dead Poets Society," "Titanic," "Jerry Maguire," and "Breakfast Club." I won't go off on the other two although I suspect you, constant reader, might disagree with me venomously on those also (?). I will split my points into different sections.

1) The movie is about the breaking down of barriers, and teenagers being real with each other, right? Wrong. What this movie virtually is a bunch of stereotypical kids whining about being stereotypical. It could have been salvaged if they actually _did_ something about it. Instead we get a small group behavior full of self-disclosure and consciousness-raising, but no actual goal! Judd Nelson at the end raises his fist in the air. An empty metaphor if I ever saw one because I saw no victory in this movie. Was it rebellion then? We already know he's a rebel. John Hughes was evidently trying to make "The Big Chill" for 1980 teens, and I guess he succeeded. At least "The Big Chill" had a discernible plot. They even admitted to their inability to interact come Monday morning (shallowness), so there is no breaking in barriers in this tripe.

2) Teenager cliches under the guise of being unique- we're not understood by our parents, so we're going to whine about our parents not understanding us. I know what teenagers are like, you know what teenagers are like, teenagers admit this is what teenagers are like: why place this inane mirror in front of us? And it's not even true to life, because of the fact that even after a week, these people wouldn't talk to each other. And will someone please explain to me how and when Sheedy and Estevez, and Nelson and Ringwald fall in love and why?! It seems completely irrelvent to anything in the movie. Those parts have no reason for being there. Not to mention the shallowness of Estevez's character: she's wearing about a pound of makeup and wow, she's pretty now and less of a freak. Hey, lonely people out there...it's really that easy! (sarcasam)

3) John Hughes in general: I think his best movie is "Planes, Trains, & Automobiles"--the very dark road-movie comedy. I hate "Sixteen Candles" because of its disgusting Asian-stereotype portrayal (just as bad as the one in "Breakfast at Tiffanys") and what was more-or-less date-rape at the end. "Ferris Bueller"...let's just say that I don't know how people can watch that movie over and over again for their whole lives. I desperately want to slap that damn kid until he can no longer stand up straight. And Hughes has about as successful a career as the former comedian Billy "My Giant" Crystal has. This IS the same man who inflicted "Flubber" and "Home Alone 3" on the world, ladies and germs. He does not deserve our reverence in the least. Which brings me to...

4) the dedication that students (children of the 80's) have to this movie (especially females), is horrid. Being a former college student, again and again, I have walked into lounges to see a bunch of females watching "Breakfast Club" (along with "Sixteen Candles"-see above), and its audience growing poignantly silent (or even squeezing out tears) when Brian is talking about his parents and yadda yadda yaddda, it makes me sick to my stomach just to see it on the shelves of video stores.

I liked this movie the first time I saw it back in high school. And I liked "Dead Poets Society" (aka "we killed off our main character to make the audience cry") and "Titanic" (aka "one of the worst script/biggest emotional- scams ever") But by god, if I never see "The Breakfast Club" again, it'll be too soon. Indeed, it'll be too soon if I pass by a group of people watching "The Breakfast Club."

Love,
Colin Ryono
President, Founder, & Only Member of
the "I Hate The Breakfast Club" Club.

[ please return to the main movie monologue page ]